And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize