These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize