Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
