I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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