i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
