I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
