do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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