That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
