What a fucking waste of an outfit
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
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