everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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