Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
