sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I CAN MOONWALK!
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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