marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
