We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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