Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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