God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
handjob tips. give me some.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
