I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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