party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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