why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
