Well douche your snatch and let's go!
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize