You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
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