I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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