no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
