after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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