what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize