i was born a porn star she said
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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