oh god the rape fog is back!
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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