Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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