i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
