just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
