did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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