his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
