Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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