ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I need a beard to bite.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize