Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
