im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Will exercising make me less horny?
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