Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
