I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
this hospital has no fireball
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
