you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
