I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
