it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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