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Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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