covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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