i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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