we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
