So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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