So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize