Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
