Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
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