well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
