We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
where does the pee come out of this thing
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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